I DO ...

Hey Buddy,

whoaaaa... the wedding is next week!
Excitement mounts and everything is almost in place for the day.
Church rehearsal for the 'bridal march and exchange of vows' is this Sunday.
It's going to be quite an exceptional experience for the relatives as this is the first time many of them are going for a 'Church Wedding.'  (smile)
What a nice way to get people to church!

Imagine the 'rascal' taking a bride and saying 'I do'.
What a journey it has been for him ... for all of us.

We were finalising the seating arrangement for the 300 guests, a small group of us discussing who to place where.
I told my parents that I would have wanted you at the Main Table.
Both Mum and Dad nodded in agreement at that.
Everyone was silent for a moment, each lost in his/her own thoughts.

Mum tried to be funny and remarked, "wah...sure your son would have received a big angpow from his boss when he chum-cha. One less angpow now but never mind, his papa and mummy will make up.  He is everyone's favorite boy!'
We laughed and changed subject.

Missing you and will miss you even more at the wedding.

- Me -

FOOD TASTING

Hey Buddy,

You'll love these ...scrumptious.
I can almost hear you say, "wah-lau-eh"
(smiles)

WEDDING JOY

Laughter, joy, feasting and merry making shall return to our house once again as we make preparations for a September wedding between Brandon and June.
We give thanks with a grateful heart for God's grace, mercy and faithfulness which is new every morning.  It is by HIS goodness and not on our own merits that we continue to enjoy His love, protection, forgiveness and favor upon our lives.

To HIM be all honor, glory, power and praise...

+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+

Choosing the perfect bridal gown and evening wear for the bride.

Can't do this without Mother-In-Grace.

Hard work but fun...

My lovely Daughter-In-Grace,

Pretty as a picture...

Okay, we'll take this one...gorgeous

Every piece looks good on June

MIG needs to look the part too!  (smiles)

So happy....so so happy

BIRTHDAY CELEBRATION

A fabulous night out with the girls to celebrate my daughter's recent birthday.
These young ladies are quite something else!  Energetic, zestful, enthusiastic, spontaneous and they really know how to have a good time!

I think the world of each and everyone of them.  They remind me of me! (smiles)

They are smart, independent, talented, hardworking, daring, ambitious, loving, kind and have BIG dreams.

Definitely my kind of people!

These ladies are also the type who wouldn't turn their backs on you, slam the door in your face, stab you in the back or call you names.

They are high flyers!

In finance, they will be riding private jets someday and in relationships, they will be fulfilled.

Stay focus ladies, and  never, never let go of your dreams.

See you at the top!

TRADITIONAL CHEONG-SUM

There's something utterly feminine about a woman in 'cheong-sum', so says my mother.
She thinks it's most becoming especially for an oriental woman.  Ages ago, mother had one made for me (and my sister) by a Shanghai Si-fu; reputed to be the best in town at that time.  It was haute couture with excellent workmanship to match.
One of a kind.

Mother who is an accomplished tailor herself is very particular and has a sharp eye for details.  She painstakingly picked the material and chose the design. 
Her efforts paid off well.  Everyone was pleased with the finished product.  Needless to say I wore it with immense pride.

There aren't many suitable occasions for this traditional wear.  I guess it's regarded as too formal.  And so the exquisite cheong-sum had stayed in the cupboard virtually untouched for years.
Admiring it has always reminded me of a bygone era; a time when women were genteel and men were honorable.  The old fashioned way. 

Strange how a garment can be seen to represent a certain culture and behavioral pattern of the human race at a particular period; reminiscent of the old world oriental charm...

For fun I slipped on the cheong-sum to see if it would still fit ...try luck.
It did!  I'll be lying if I said 'perfectly!'
Some alterations will be required but it'll work.
Think I'll flaunt it at the wedding...

COMING OF AGE

I'm in a pensive mood.
This is a Kleenex moment (sniff...sniff...sniff).
A little teary-eyed not because of sadness, pain or loss but overwhelmed by a sense of great joy, pride and gratitude. Choked up with emotions.

The baby I once cradled, nurtured and nursed in my arms is now a grown man, ready to step into perhaps the most significant stage in his life ... marriage.  Even as we celebrate with music and merry-making, we ask God Almighty to bless the union between Brandon & June. May you live in peace and harmony, loving and caring for each other; in sickness and in health.
To build an exemplary Christian home; reaching out with compassion, patience, tolerance and understanding.  Above all to 'love God with all your heart, mind and soul.'
This is a mother's prayer...

IN A DREAM...

Hi Buddy,

Guess what? 
I had a dream.... :-)

It was a surprised 'visitation' from AK ... yes, AK! 
Haven't thought about him since he left.  That has been some years already, huh.
Can't remember much of the dream but I got up with a darn good feeling.

In it AK and I were a team again-- laughing, joking and making fun of each other.  We were at a grand party; one of our annual company functions. Both of us were emcees for the night which was quite natural in our company back in those days.  You preferred to stay out of the limelight, no?!? (smiles)

AK was in his element.
He cracked jokes, humour the guests and had them in stitches. I was the able side-kick.  Everyone was cheering.
The air was decidedly festive and it was another triumphant feather-in-the-cap event.

Can't remember a time when we threw parties in the company that were not well received, eh! 
We were reputed party planners AK and I. As always we had everyone eating out of the palm of our hands especially the kwai-lohs.

As usual AK was a little intoxicated (understatement :-) but still very much in control.  
A little wobbly, he winked cheekily, gave me the thumbs up and drew me into the circle of his arm.  He's a suave one, the smooth operator!
His face was just inches from mine.  He whispered something into my ears and we both burst out ....laughing. 
(And that was when I woke up... still laughing :-)

It was the AK of the 80's at his best: Mr. H/L ... with his undeniable charisma ... jovial and entertaining; a seasoned clown bringing cheer to everyone.
He, with the mischievous eyes...the sweet words... the 'chicken' heart!

(He claimed to have got me started in shipping and taught me all I know.  I let him win!)

Khoo-Siew as he was fondly known was a good man.  You knew that too.
Passed away (when you were overseas) and I represented you and the company to pay our last respects.  I was very well received by his children.
At his ding-dong there was a huge turn out.  He was obviously a popular man; AK with the soft heart, husky voice ... the live-wire at any party.
Never a fighter. 
Easy going, generous, happy-go-lucky 'Khoo-Siew'.  It was difficult not to like him.

And of course there was the tiff - the turning point of the relationship.
Anyway that too is over with a good ending. You treated him generously and fairly: he knew it. 
I'm glad you two made peace; more correctly I'm glad we three made peace.
Love wins in the end.

I think he came to allow me a glimpse of how he wants me to see him now.
And you know what? ... he positively glowed.

Oh, what joy and comfort ...

-Me-

Hey Buddy,

 

You think I have forgotten you?  No way!

You're still very much in my mind.

 

I miss you ... especially during lunch time! 

These days I don't care much for eating; a  plain cracker and a cup of coffee is fine.  Not like in those days where we'll travel miles and miles just to have the best fish head noodles, bak-kut-teh, black chicken double boiled soup, siew-yuk-char-siew-kai-fun, Spanish roast pig, German sausages, Penang nasi kandar and what else! 

You promised that no matter how busy you were, you will surely come to take me out for lunch.

Yep... and I must commend you --- not once in the twenty five years we worked together did you ever break your promise.  Thanks Buddy! 

 

I also miss your "Good Morning" calls.  Always on time, every time. 

I have a confession though.  There were occasions when I thought you were rather cheong-hei; so long-winded!  Sorry!

 

Things have changed drastically since you were gone. 

I don't need to go to the office anymore.  New management, new policies, new practices -- IN with the new and OUT with the old.  This is expected.

We talked about it, remember?

Anyway that's over and done with.

 

Life has taken on a new dimension for me.

I'm loving it.

 

How are things with you since you've taken up residence at the New Address?? 

Aren't you glad you decided to 'invest' when I asked you to, huh.

No need to thank me.  It was my greatest pleasure and privilege!

 

You've gone ahead of me. Someday I'll join you; that's a surety!

 

Meanwhile, think I'm required here. Will await instructions from the TOP!

I'm trying to do all I can to make things better for everyone here.  

You left in such a hurry and as the Chinese saying goes, "left behind a whole load of su-chow-see!"

 

Come to me sometime; maybe in a dream.  We need to talk.

But it's not important even if I don't hear from you!  Things have a way of sorting themselves out eventually.

 

Everything will work out well in the end and if it doesn't, it's not the end yet!

 

Enjoy your rest, Buddy...

 

- Me-

 

CAPT. WILLIAM VAN GEYZEL

(In the arms of his Saviour and Lord Jesus Christ since 28 October 2011)

 

 

Your favourite tin-kai-chuk (frog's leg porridge)

 

 

Who is a happier person: The one who did wrong, sought forgiveness and was forgiven OR the one who boasts that he is without sin, blameless and above reproach?

SEARCH ME O GOD and know my heart today, Try me O Saviour and know my thoughts I pray, See if there be some wicked way in me, Cleanse me from every wrong and set me free...

LIFE'S DOWNSIDE...

Unbelievable but true.
Earlier this year in January 2012,  I was operated on to remove a tumour - the size of a ping pong ball - in the brain.
According to medical reports it was a life threatening procedure as all such operations involving the brain usually carry huge and high risks.

Strangely, initially there were no distinct signs to indicate the growth except for the irritation caused by my blurred vision!  It was deteriorating rapidly.  Thinking that I needed to change my glasses and contact lens I procrastinated.  As my vision worsen, I blamed it on cataracts!   

You know how it is: postponing seeking medical help because of work commitments and other more pressing matters at hand.  How silly can one get?  But that's me!
I would still have delayed had it not been for my loss of co-ordination.  I couldn't drive nor work the computer.  How much worse can THAT get! 

I had gone totally blind on one eye and the other was fast going as well!
The results of the MRI scan and other tests were worrying.  Surgery was required immediately. 

Five Professors/doctors/physicians were involved to make sure I was fit for surgery and well covered for post medical care.  I must commend this brilliant medical team and am privileged to be under their excellent professional care.

I survived and am grateful to family, friends and strangers/church members (local and abroad) who prayed like crazy!  Thank you all.

In recent months, we had lots of heart-to-heart talks, God and I.
There are many things that happen in my life that I don't understand and it seems God is silent most of the time.  He's not much for talking.

The strange thing is, during the entire time ---from the moment the tumour was discovered and I was operated on, during the convalescence period etc. -- I was not in the least bit fearful.  Most people would be frantic but somehow I remained calm and composed; telling myself to trust and surrender my fate to a loving God.
This tranquility must have come from Him. I cannot explain it.

To this day, the doctors who attended to me (then and now) continue to be amazed.

To God be the glory... 

COURAGE IS NOT THE ABSENCE OF FEAR

To stay in the safety of the boat and wait out the storm or step into the water and experience a miracle...?
To hide in the shadow and let others walk all over you or step into the light and defend your cause...?
To succumb to threats and bullying ... or to rise up and say 'No'?

It's the norm.  People are being taken advantage of at the work place, boardroom, bedroom, schoolroom - just about in every segment of society.  The social system is such; the strong preying on the weak.

It's tough being the under-dog.
You'll find no sympathy or justice.  People like to stand on the side of the winner and hardly the loser.  The under-dog suffers alone and fend for himself.

Sometimes he even has to concede defeat and accepts the punishment while the guilty parties revel in their accomplishment.

At other times, he needs to disassociate himself from so called friends who are bent on hurting him. Surround himself with people who truly care and love him.
Whoever says that's going to be easy is just pulling his leg. 
Travel the road less travelled:  he has to realise he deserves more than the way he is being treated..

CHRISTMAS IN AUGUST...

"Angels we have heard on high, Sweetly singing o'er the plains, And the mountains, in reply,  Echoing their joyous strains.  Glo.....ria in excelsis Deo!   Glo.....ria in excelsis Deo! ...."  

Christmas in August?   Why not?
Christmas is about loving and giving. Why wait till December to love and give when you can do that everyday ...

DREAM BIG...

DREAMS: The Vehicles On Which We Ride Our Fantasies.

Seen at MPH bookshop at The Curve today.
The little pinkie: AS TIME GOES BY -- a book by Lynn Wong on the top shelf.
Many thanks to all the people who made this possible.

Twenty two months after the launch and the book is still visible. Feeling pretty good...

Goodbye Memories...

There're memories I thought I'll never forget; memories of people, places and pleasures. These I have clung to with my dear life. They are my buffer, a hiding place --- a way of escape.

For too long, I've been unwilling to let go. But now these same memories have lost their appeal and are slowly but gradually fading into obscurity.  Strangely, I don't miss them anymore.  Fleeting like the morning dew; in a little while they are no more.

Behold all things are made new. The past is dead and buried and it should be left that way. What's the point in opening up old wounds. The future is bright and beautiful and it's ours to behold...

'Kept' Woman

It's true: I am a 'kept' woman. Have been for years. Didn't always like it; felt there were too many constraints and restrictions. Resisted with little understanding and appreciation for HIM. Kept the relationship a secret. Felt a little embarrassed and thought HE wasn't relevant for our time. Got to know HIM better and started to trust HIM more and more. My perception of HIM gradually changed. I was liberated; free to be who I am. HE alone make sense. HE alone is enough. The world is reality. HE is real. I've given my heart and working at surrendering my mind. Eventually HE will keep my soul. Then I'll be HIS, completely.
"I know to Whom I belong."

I believe ...

Everyone is facing some challenge in his life right now. On the outward, he may appear jolly, funny and gay; she: poised, confident and collected. In reality it's different. Each has to contemplate battling with one's own demons; a private/personal warfare.

When we look at the various degrees of human suffering, we cannot help but lament, why? For what purpose? And for how long? The senseless killing, abuse and injustice.... there's no answer. Available now are drugs and medication for almost every illness that plague the human physical body but none that can truly heal a broken heart, restore shattered dreams or erase emotional scars.

"Fear not, only believe. I am with you even unto the end of the earth." I believe but help my unbelief...

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